I cannot believe that I am actually going to say something positive about the fact that Donald Trump was elected president, but here goes: We have finally witnessed the death of the sex scandal. And it is long overdue. With a President Trump elected and serving in office, we simply cannot have a sex scandal that sticks- ever again. The main reason is that many progressives have appropriately nicknamed him President Pussy-Grabber because the entire world heard him say that he has a habit of grabbing women by their genitals if he finds them attractive. That is sexual assault and there is no sex scandal that can Trump that. With full knowledge of this fact of his history, the nation elected the guy anyway- almost entirely on the votes of millions of people who claim to have “conservative values.” I have been following politics for years and I was entirely unaware that William F. Buckley had written about the virtues of random crotch grabbing.
In addition to his nasty little sexual assault habit, Trump’s books bragging about his sexual exploits and his well documented history of adultery and philandering all serve to permanently inoculate every public figure in the country from losing a position over sexual misconduct. This excludes any sex crime prosecution, of course, because at that point we really have gone well beyond a mere scandal so that is a separate consideration. And this is actually a good thing because it is high time that American’s stopped paying attention to what public figures do with their private parts with consenting adults- regardless of the sexual orientation of the parties involved. If some congressman walks in on this in his office, does it matter that he enjoyed little taste before heading into a committee meeting, regardless of his relationship status?
We have always been prone to wasting precious time and valuable resources publicly discussing absolute nonsense. While it may be a gross oversimplification, it is reasonable to suggest that Al Gore lost the presidency to W. because Bill got blown by an intern.
I’d bet you my check that every single American who is of age and is capable of having sex, has done something, somewhere at some time that he or she wishes they had not done and would not want the world to know about. It may have been an inappropriate time or place. It may have been an inappropriate person.
There could be any number of reasons why the deed got done and shouldn’t have been, but do we really help ourselves as a nation by ejecting capable people from important positions over such misdeeds? Does their orgasm or ejaculation really matter enough to upend the machinery of our government to replace them with someone else who has probably done the same thing themselves without it having come to light?
The sex scandal has always represented the height of hypocrisy anyway because in order for any incident to become a full on scandal, someone has to be standing in public judgment of the poor sap who got caught with his pants down. Someone has to be willing to sit at a microphone and on camera and excoriate somebody over doing something that they know full well that they have done but just have not been held accountable for yet. Consider that Newt Gingrich, Dennis Hastert and Bob Livingston were the leaders of the movement to impeach Bill Clinton and all three wound up with ugly sex scandals of their own- punctuated by Hastert being sentenced to federal prison in connection with his history of deflowering teenage boys when he was the wrestling coach back home in Illinois before he became a big time “family values” member of Congress. Hastert represents the type of guys I would make a hard exception for and let sex scandals stick around: those phony “family values” jerk-offs who get caught humping around with their friends’ wives, laying up with teenage boys or subscribing to the allegedly upscale public access p@ssy that is available in the privileged D.C. underground.
I say rake those assholes over the coals since they are dumb enough to try to leverage their religious beliefs and social codes for electoral benefit. Let their asses burn, but for everybody else, just let it go: Sex scandals are dead.
And there is even more good news on the death of sex scandals on the foreign policy front. While it is deeply concerning that the Russians hacked into our private information to influence the election, the fact that they actually believed that they could blackmail Donald Trump with a sex scandal is hysterical. What decade are these jackasses living in and do they know who they are trying to blackmail? You cannot blackmail a guy who just doesn’t give a f@ck what most people think and that is Trump. His followers wouldn’t budge from his side if the Russians had a Trump version of the R. Kelly video and hacked into C. Span and played it on a 24 hour loop.
These folks don’t care if Trump is secret business partners with Vladimir Putin so the idea of him losing support over a sex tape is comical. So we now have a guy at the top of our government who is absolutely sex scandal proof and maybe- just on this one issue- that is exactly what America needed.